#the things that help you sleep

To my unknown lover and our little joke. I will forever remember you with the not-so-authentic phrase, Je suis mermaid. After a while, you don’t even know what is helping you sleep. Be it a woman’s embrace or a man’s embrace – is there any difference? You sit on your chair and wear your tin-foil […]

#last night, I dreamed of whales

Becky leads us to the dark shade of a cherry blossom tree. The petals are flying in the air, twirling and whirling in circles. A few petals fall on Becky’s soft, hairy head. She shakes it off with annoyance and sneeze. I’m always allergic to flowers, she says. It’s strange. I thought only people are […]

#i can’t do this anymore

#i can’t do this anymore

I can’t do this anymore, I say, as I hold onto her hand and lie there, breathing, convulsing, living. I can’t do this anymore, I say, as she squeezes my hands, whispering, I am here, darling, I am here. I can’t do this anymore, I think, I can’t continue to be a burden that you […]

#15. the fourth song

#15. the fourth song

Becky and I sits by a little campfire that I (mainly) built with the (little) help from her. Are you getting fatter? I ask. She glances dagger at me and for a moment, I finally know how a look could kill. The White Misty Thingy curls his smoky arm around me. My eyes can’t distinguish […]

#14. do you prefer me being pretty or healthy?

#14. do you prefer me being pretty or healthy?

Say, Becky, has anyone told you that you’re ugly? Straight to your face? I lie down on the green moss carpet that the forest so generously gifts to me. Becky rests her whole fat body on my chest and purrs happily as I stroke her tiny pointy ears. Oh, plenty, my good sir, she yawns […]

#what are you thinking?

#what are you thinking?

So, how are you feeling today? The counselor in the white blouse asks. I find it hard to concentrate on an appropriate answer as his cheap, toned-down blue T-shirt creates an immense border. The border between trusting him and trusting me. The border between being saved and wallowing in the same sort of routines until […]

#how are you?

#how are you?

A tribute to my mother in free verse. Hope it will be worthy of all her sacrifices. You lie awake at night, as I lie next to you, convulsing, trembling, wandering in the land of the Death. If I must be honest, I was on the border when you turn around holding me down and […]

#11. pinky promise?

#11. pinky promise?

I say, why is this forest so dark and gloomy? Are you trying to lead me down to Hell? Becky turns her head slightly and gives me a sharp glance as if I have offended Her Majesty in a very nasty way, and there is no chance for me to gain back her trust. A […]

#i can’t sleep

#i can’t sleep

He throws the pillow at me to wake me up. It’s five in the morning. I can’t sleep, he says nonchalantly as if that is enough of a reason to wake me up. My eyes are trying to figure out whether it’s my beloved that I see, or just a cruel shadow of someone who […]

#rain

#rain

I thought we would go out today, you say, but instead, we are staying home and watching the boring TV show, and listening to the sound of the pouring rain outside – Are you out of your mind? He curls into a ball on my laps, spilling his complains the same way a bartender spills […]